It's no secret that we all show love in different ways. Have you heard of love languages before? Find out what your spouse's love language is, plus the best ways to show love in a way that they want to receive it. It will really make a difference in your relationship!
It's a well-known fact that when you're in a relationship, it's the little things that matter! Of course, the big things matter, too. But the little things keep you going and help to make your day better. Seriously, stop and think about what your spouse does for you on a daily basis that makes you feel loved.
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What little things do you do for your sweetheart on a daily basis to show your love and gratitude for them? For the next 7 days, we challenge you to pick 1 way to show your spouse you love them every single day! One way to make the “little things” you do for your spouse have a bigger impact is to make sure that you're showing them your love in their love language.
What exactly are we talking about? First, let's get in to the…
DIFFERENT LOVE LANGUAGES
There are 5 love languages! Wanna strengthen your relationship? Learn more about your spouse and what they need to feel loved.
Love is something you do for someone else, not something you do for yourself.Gary Chapman
If you want to know more details about the different love languages, then check out Gary Chapman's book, The 5 Love Languages. It'll help you to figure out what yours and your spouse's love languages are. You'll be able to start showing your spouse love in their preferred way!
OUR FAVORITE WAYS TO SHOW LOVE
We've come up with the best ideas so that you can show your sweetie just how much you love and appreciate them! The best part? These are all fun ideas that are cheap or FREE! Hmmmm, now why does that sound familiar? ;)
*We also polled our VIFreebs to find out how THEY show love, so we'll sprinkle a few of their ideas throughout this post, too!
Try to figure out your spouse's love language and do something nice for them in that category. Remember that you can have more than one love language, so feel free to try out different ideas in different categories until you know what they respond best to.
Cook his favorite meal, snuggle with him and watch his favorite show with him, and buy him some dark chocolate!!Colleen M.
Colleen covered all the bases with her husband! You go girl!
Alright, let's get on to the different ways to show love to your spouse!
This is just what it sounds like! Those who have the love language of physical touch means just that – they feel the most love through physical contact. While your mind may go straight to one physical act in particular (wink, wink!), it's not just about that.
What may seem like a small thing to you could mean the world to them. Keep these different ways to show love in mind if your spouse thrives off of physical touch the most:
- Have a make-out session.
- Hug them for longer than normal.
- Hold hands in the car.
- Lovingly touch often.
- Get jiggy with it. (You just know this had to make it in there, right?!)
He always asks for back scratches, so when I give him some without him asking, he is so happy.Elizabeth C.
- Snuggle on the couch.
- Caress their face.
- Have tickle fights.
- Play footsies at the table.
- Give them a kiss every time you part ways and every time you're back together.
The first year I was with my boyfriend, I made him his favorite dinner and offered him a long 30 min massage to help him relax. I bought some petals and little decorations at the Dollar Store, I keep using them every year, but I change how I arrange them. I think that your love language speaks a lot for you.Vanessa S.
Some of these may seem weird or random to you, but your spouse will be so grateful! However, be sure that you're in the moment with these and don't make it too forced. Nobody wants to kiss a cold fish! Show them that you love them and they'll be happy to return the favor.
WORDS OF AFFIRMATION
Does a simple “thank you” or “I'm grateful for you” go a long ways for your spouse? If so, then they likely love best in this category! And for the most part, it doesn't really matter how you say it.
Making eye contact is always the preferred way for them to hear words of affirmation. It really lets them know how much you love them and how much you mean it! But it doesn't always have to be face to face. They still feel loved if they hear this over the phone, through a text, or even written in a simple note. It's the thought that goes into it that counts!
Writing love notes and leaving them in different places for them to find.Sarah M.
See how much your spouse loves hearing these ways to show love:
- “I love you.”
- “I’m thankful for you.”
- “Thank you for all that you do for me and our family.”
- “You’re so handsome/beautiful.”
- “I love being with you.”
- “You just did something difficult and you did it well!”
- “I’m here for you.”
- “You are really good at _____________.”
- “I’m so proud of the way that you work so hard for our family.”
- “I love you more today than yesterday.”
- “That was the best meal you've ever cooked.”
- “Love that outfit on you!”
- “Your hair looks great today!”
One year my husband made me a Valentine’s Day card from supplies he had at work. Used a file folder as the card and filled it with all the Love quotes he found online that related to us. Then added a message and hearts. That was back in 2007 and I still have it.Angelica M.
There's nothing like a good love note for someone who lives for words of affirmation!
My husband used a tabbed sticky note pad. On the front he wrote a note with 5 reasons why he would always love me and then each tab was numbered and when you turn to those tabs it goes into more details about each reason. I still have it 3 years later and whenever I’m feeling down in the dumps I read that and it lifts my spirits. To date it’s the best Valentine's Day gift ever 🥰Rosa P.
Keep that in mind and you won't have a hard time coming up with different ways to show love to your spouse.
WAYS TO SHOW LOVE WITH QUALITY TIME
It this day and age, it is so easy to be in the same room, but be 1,000 miles apart. Between social media, smart phones, and being able to binge on your favorite tv shows for hours on end, you don't stand a chance to get any real quality time in there.
Having eye contact and all of your attention is really all that your spouse wants if they live for the quality time category! Try these different ways to show love to your spouse and be sure to be all-in when you're together:
- Unplug when you’re in the room together and look in their eyes when you’re talking.
- Drive around and talk about your first date.
- Play a game together after the kids go to bed instead of watching tv.
- Read the same book and then discuss what you think at the end.
- Plan a weekend getaway together. (It doesn’t have to happen right now!)
My husband and I both LOVE the outdoors, so we will load up our bikes and hit the trails on Valentines Day (we try to find somewhere we haven't gone to before and thats free to get in), we get a little friendly competition going (He usually wins because he is that good at biking, its all good because I love seeing him so happy :laughing:) I will pack a lunch and surprise him with all his favorite things! It makes us both happy, we get some exercise in and we get to see some pretty cool views! We live in Texas so the weather is usually warm.Lorane K.
- Watch their favorite show and then talk all about it once it’s over.
- Go with them to the store, to run errands, or to go shopping for something.
- Plan weekly one-on-one time and put it on the calendar!
- Cook dinner together, then do the dishes together once you’re done.
- Take a walk together and talk about the future.
If you're really attached to your phone, then these may seem like hard tasks to you. But it will get easier, we promise! We've got some great tips on unplugging when you're around your family. Your sweetie will be so grateful when you start doing that and implementing these different ways to show your love to them!
There are some people who just love to receive gifts! You may think that this seems vain, but it's not really about the gift that they're receiving. It's more about the thought that goes into the gift. They don't necessarily want you to buy them something because it's pretty or cool, but because it reminds you of them and you thought that they would like it!
These different ways to show love don't necessarily have to be expensive, they just have to be from the heart! Something small and cheap can go just as far as something that's expensive. So don't think that this means that you'll have to be stopping at the jewelry store or sporting store every time that you want to show your spouse that you love them.
Try out these ideas and you'll see how something simple can go far:
- Make them a handmade gift. Pinterest has tons of ideas!
- Get them a little trinket that made you think of them.
- Make them a scrapbook of their favorite pictures. Chatbooks and Snapfish make it super simple!
- Make a playlist of songs that remind you of them. (Remember the days of mixtapes?!)
- Frame a new picture of your family.
- Take them their favorite drink or snack.
- Make them their favorite meal.
- Give them a coupon book that they can redeem at a later time.
- Give them something that reminds them of your first date.
- Get them something small from their wish list.
Avoid buying roses that day! LOL! That'll save you a bundle! Just as beautiful the day after.Melodee D.
See, they're not all about just buying something random from the store! ;)
WAYS TO SHOW LOVE WITH ACTS OF SERVICE
These different ways to show love may seem like they're chore-oriented to those who don't have the acts of service love language. But they're really not! It's more about doing something thoughtful for them that takes something off of their plate for them.
Try out these ways to show love and see how they go over:
- Do their least favorite house chore! Bonus points for doing it FOREVER!
- Ask them what you can do to help them in their day, then do it!
- Do all of the laundry for them this week.
- Let them sleep…
I let him sleep in. He always takes our son to hockey – 7 and 8 am practices on the weekends – and he’s always willing to let me sleep in since sleep is MY love language so I let him sleep in when we have the chance.Melody S.
- Wash their car for them, inside and out!
- Have they been wanting something done for a while, like a room painted or something hung on the wall? Pick a day and do it!
- Cook breakfast for them on Saturday morning, especially if they usually do the cooking!
I used to buy those expensive chocolate dipped strawberries from the store… this year I’m making my own to save money! Yum!Kellie K.
- Give them an hour of uninterrupted self-care time.
- Notice that their drink is empty? Fill it up for them!
- Is there something that they usually forget when you leave the house? Grab it for them or keep a spare so that they have what they need.
I clean the house… LOLBrooklyn R.
Acts of service may seem like ordinary, everyday things to you, but they're major for those who love in this language.
My husband use to love playing Call of Duty… But when u have a new baby in the house, you don’t really have a lot of free time… So for Valentine’s Day I bought a bunch of his favorite snack food, put it in a basket I had in the house…With a note that said, This Saturday is your day, please enjoy a fun filled game night… Happy Valentines Day, Love your wife and Baby.Alice H.
Start showing your spouse love in these ways and they'll be so thankful!
Okay, well there you have it! You've now got some great ways to show love in different love languages to your sweetheart. Which one are you trying first? Let us know in the comments!
Looking for more great ideas to connect with your spouse?
- We've got some great ideas for at home date ideas that are basically free!
- If you're wanting to get out of the house, then try out these free or cheap date ideas that are out on the town!
- Getting your money in order with your spouse is important. Start having monthly money dates and get on the same page with your spouse!