How I got my kids to STOP FIGHTING!

Hey Freebs! I'm actually on a cruise ship as we speak, enjoying some time with the family. But I got my act together before leaving and recorded a quick video for you, about something that y'all have been asking me about a ton on Instagram.

As you probably know, we have 5 young kids…and yes…our house is always messy, and yes, they fight like cats and dogs. Lately we felt like their negative behavior was escalating, so we took something my parents use to do in our house growing up, and added our own Page Twist to it!

The good news? It's working.

This new method has helped us get quality one-on-one time with our kids, and has helped cut back on the incessant bickering that we had been plagued with for so long.

It's such a simple concept! I don't really know what to call it. To our kids we refer to it as “Tuck In Time”, “Special Tuck In Time” or “Your Day”. (Any suggestions on a solid name for it??) Here's a quick video about how we do it, why, and some suggestions for making it work in your home as well!

Watch the video online or click and watch below:

Crazy-simple, right?? It has been fun to see what songs they want to listen to, the things they want to do with us at night. Bubba and I trade off throughout the week so we each get 1x with each kid, and I look forward to “my night” with the kids so much!

how we got our kids to stop fighting! SUCH a simple thing!

Do you do anything like this with your kids? If you do, share below so we can learn how you do it as well! It's a simple thing, but I hope it helps bring some peace to your home as it has ours so far.

Gotta get back to the dance party on deck 8!

If you try it, let me know how it goes!

XO

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Comments

  1. We did this for a while and I too thought it was a lifesaver. We called it “the kid of the day” and we got the idea from Rach over at Family Ever After blog. We haven’t done it for a bit but I keep thinking we need to do it again so thanks for the motivation!!

  2. What a great idea! I’ve been making it a point lately to spend one-on-one time with my kids every day, it makes a world of difference for behavior and general happiness in our home–I’ve also found when I give them that attention they’re more willing to listen when I do need to discipline. My parents used to do a similar thing with each of us having our special day of the week; some of the things we got to do were choosing the movie, sitting in the front seat of the car (when we were old enough), and licking the beaters if Mom made any goodies that day. It also was our dish day, so it was like a balance of privilege and responsibility.

  3. Can you give more details on how bed time works. If you have 5 kids and its Tuck’s day what happens to the other kids vs. to Tuck?

  4. Love this. My kids love when they are the ‘special helper’ at school, so it makes sense to do that at home too!

  5. We do the same thing! I have two girls, now 11 and 8, who rotate getting to be the “Princess” for the day! This saved us back when they were like 7 and 4 after I had read the Parents article one day on summer break. We were together all day every day, so we tried the KOD system. It has been the easiest way to solve little and big arguments. My girls even came up with the idea to trade days so each can be the princess on their birthday! So sweet! I agree with you, Jordan, by giving my girls the consistency of the rotation, they freely give in to the small things because they understand they can have their free choice the next day!
    ~Jess
    http://www.parents.com/parenting/better-parenting/positive/kid-of-the-day/

  6. So question… how do you handle it when one of the others throws a fit because they aren’t happy with one the choices that the chosen one picks for seating arrangement or music etc.?

    • Fits aren’t allowed in our house. If someone is throwing a fit we will physically remove them until they cool down. We will put them in the car, outside, or in their rooms. Not a punishment, it’s just a “we don’t throw fits so go get it out of your system and I’ll come get you when you’re calm.” Even our 2 year old. And we just tell them to be patient because they will get their turn! Eventuallhy they will trust in the system!

  7. Oh my gosh! What a great idea! I would LOVE to try this with my boys. My challenge is I am now a “single parent”. My ex-husband only takes the kids every other weekend, no extra days- not even in the summer time AND my 3 year-old grandson is living with us for the time being. They are CONSTANTLY fighting and bickering. What am I to do with the other 2 kids while we’re doing the 1-on-1 time? Arg! I’m seriously ready to pull my hair out!

    • That’s so hard! You’ll just have to do it while they are sleeping, or stick a movie on for the others? Just do what you can!

  8. My parents did “night out with dad” and each weekend took one kid out with a $$ limit. Also every day we got 20 minutes a day with each of them. Being able to say at a moments notice ‘this will be my 20 minutes’ was nice to get that attention or get that ride somewhere. I always felt special when they took that time with us. There were 6 kids.

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